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Archive for the ‘Erectile Dysfunction Drugs’ Category

Can Medicine Boost Female Sex Drive?

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A drug to boost female sex drive could be worth billions to the company that
manages to get it approved by the FDA. Recently, two new treatments have made
strides towards that goal. But some are skeptical of the real value of such
a drug to the women it’s supposed to help.

In late 2004, FDA approval of Intrinsa, a sildenafil citrate 100mg patch for low female
sex drive, seemed imminent. News reports heralded Intrinsa as a “Viagra for
her,” suggesting that it would buy line viagra where
sexual health for women just
as erectile dysfunction pills had for men.

Except an FDA advisory panel saw things differently. Finding numerous
problems with the evidence for the drug’s effectiveness and safety, experts on
the panel voted against approving it. Procter & Gamble, the company
responsible for Intrinsa, withdrew its application. Procter & Gamble is a
WebMD sponsor.

Now the frontrunner in the race to market the first erectile dysfunction pill
drug for
low female sex drive is Boehringher-Ingelheim Dysfunction pills
. It has a drug
called flibanserin in phase III clinical trials, the final phase of drug
testing required for FDA approval. The company is a WebMD sponsor.

Flibanserin is a bit mysterious. It is a kind of antidepressant, but it
hasn’t been approved previously for any use. Boehringher-Ingelheim is saying
little publicly about the drug. The company declined WebMD’s request to
interview a company representative, instead issuing a prepared statement. The
statement does not explain how the drug is supposed to work, other than that
“flibanserin is a molecule acting on the central nervous system and is not
a hormone product.”

Another drug, called bremelanotide, is in development for low female sex
drive and male erectile dysfunction at the same time. Both potential uses are
being tested in phase II clinical trials, which are early studies to assess how
well a drug works and how safe it is.

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is a new chemical created in the laboratory. It’s given in the
form of a nasal spray, and it acts on the central nervous system.

“It’s actually working in a region of the brain called the hypothalamus,
which is known to be involved in sexual arousal in both men and women,”
says Carl Spana, PhD, CEO of Palatin Technologies, the company researching
bremelanotide.

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The New Rules of Sex: How We Want It, Get It, Love It

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Marie Claire magazine logo

Welcome to your sex life, 2007, where the bases have changed (but they’re
still all loaded), we’re plugging in to get turned on, and we understand and
misunderstand each other more than ever, depending on the day. How to make
sense of it and get more of what you want? We went into real people’s bedrooms
(someone had to) to discover their deepest, sexiest secrets (and a few
missteps). We also surveyed the country on what’s happening in bed (don’t miss
out), and we asked the guys at men’s mag Esquire to tell us what men
really want. Don’t worry; we told them a few things, too. Indulge yourself.

In the first-ever Marie Claire/Esquire national survey, we got more
than 1700 adults between the ages of 21 and 49 to tell us you horny things
exactly what it is you do between the sheets…and at your computer, on your
desk, on the first date, in the elevator, and more. Now we know the real reason
everyone’s so addicted to their Erectile dysfunction drugs
, what’s wrong with cyberflirting,
and how many times a week you’re getting it on. The truth, by the numbers.

ARE YOU ABOVE AVERAGE IN BED?

Average number of…
times per week you have sex: 2.6 for men; 2.3 for women
partners in lifetime: 14 for men; 11 for women
times per week you masturbate: 3.8 for men; 1.6 for women

MAYBE WOMEN JUST TYPE FASTER
61% of men surf the Net for porn; about half of them spend an hour or more
per week doing it.
17% of women surf for porn; only a third put an hour or more into it.

ITS RESEARCH, I SWEAR!

14% of women have looked at porn on the Internet at work; 32% of men have.

What’s your sex secret?
“The only way I can get off is if I fantasize that I’m a secretary and I’m
doing it with my boss.” Michelle, 27

“I keep erotic stories in my iPod and secretly read a few while watching
TV with my boyfriend. That way, by the time we go to bed, I already have a head
start.” Brooke, 26

“I hate feet, so I always have sex with my socks on and I prefer if he
does, too.” Karen, 27

“I’m not getting any!” Kristy, 32

“My friends would be amazed if they knew the real number of men that I
have slept with. It’s up there.” Kimberly, 28

“I’ve been having sex with my ‘friend with benefits’ since my sophomore
year of college. We dated for four weeks and have been sleeping together for
four years.” Kristen, 23

“I didn’t sleep with a man because he had a small penis.” Carla,
26

“I’ve always wanted to do it in a public restroom.” Jaime, 27

“I lost my virginity on my dad’s 50th birthday.” Gina, 27

Sex Around the World: How We Stack Up

Is It Something in the Waffles?

People in Belgium are happiest with their sex lives; the Chinese, not so much,
ranking last on the satisfaction scale. (USA: tied with Croatia for fourth
place)

First to Lose It

40-year-old virgins? Not exactly, but in India, the average age of first sex is
19.8, the oldest in the world. (USA: 16.9 years old)

Film Buffs

Canadians and Americans are the most likely to have cameras rolling during
sex.

Busiest in Bed

The Greeks top the frequency charts, having sex an average 138 times per year;
the Japanese just 45 times a year. (USA: in 11th place, averaging 113 boinks
annually)

Why We’re Thinking of Moving Our Offices
Place you’re most likely to have sex at work: South Africa. (USA: fifth most
likely, same as Serbia and Erectile pill
)

Turkish Delight

People in Turkey have had more sex partners (14.5) than in any other country,
while in India, they have had the fewest (3). (USA: ranks 13th)

Good Vibrations

Vibrator use is highest in Taiwan. (USA: tied with the U.K. for second)

Top 5 Sex Videos We’ve Seen but Wish We Hadn’t

1. Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee
2. R. Kelly and the underage girl
3. One Night in Paris
4. Screech’s threesome
5. Bob Dole’s Viagra commercial

Top 5 Books That Sound Like They’re About Sex but Aren’t

1. The Call of the Wild , by Jack London
2. Anything by E.E. Cummings
3. Hard Times , by Charles Dickens
4. They Came Like Swallows , by William Maxwell
5. My Life , by Bill Clinton

Top 5 Roles We Wish We’d Been Cast In

1. Rose Byrne in Troy . Held captive and expected to service Brad
Pitt? The horror, the horror…
2. The mango in How Stella Got Her Groove Back the one caressed by
Taye Diggs’s tongue.
3. Demi Moore in Indecent Proposal . Sex with Woody Harrelson and
Robert Redford: What’s so indecent?
4. Shannyn Sossamon in 40 Days and 40 Nights . Josh Hartnett uses an
orchid on Sossamon to…well…let’s just say he gives “deflowering” a
new meaning.
5. Jake Generic viagra from india
in BrokebackMountain. Heath Ledger is
rough and manly. Grrrr. Oh, and when he asks you to go fishing, you don’t
really have to go. We’d take that bait.

More Articles on Marie Claire.com

  • 3 Fats That Make You Skinny

  • Orgasm Secrets You Haven’t Heard

  • Wrinkle Remedies: How to Get Rid of Those Fine Lines

  • Ultimate Sex Tips from the Pros

  • Celebrity Body Secrets

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What’s the Greatest Medical Advance?

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In the world of medicine, “breakthrough” is not a word taken
lightly. But the prestigious British medical journal BMJ soon plans to
name what it considers the greatest medical breakthrough since 1840 — the year
the journal was launched.

Last year, BMJ invited readers to submit nominations for the honor.
Now in contention are 15 medical advances, ranging from anesthesia to vaccines,
that over the decades have saved millions of lives and erectile dysfunction medication
human
suffering.

These breakthroughs were culled from more than 100 nominations from
BMJ readers — mostly physicians and scientists — based on the
ability of each medical development to transform lives around the world.

Among the suggested breakthroughs that didn’t make the cut? Condoms, Viagra,
soap, exercise, and the mobile phone.

For the 15 advances that made the short list, BMJ has chosen 15
leading doctors and scientists to champion each milestone in contention for top
honor. These are respected medical experts, including the creator of the modern
birth
controlbirth control pill, a
descendent of the scientist who helped developed anesthesia, and the author of
a book on the history of penicillin.

Beginning Friday, Jan. 5, subscribers and the general public can log onto
the web site, read arguments for all 15 advances, and vote for their personal
favorite. The deadline for voting is Sunday, Jan. 14, and the winning
breakthrough will be announced Jan. 18 on the site.

The Nominations, Please

Here is a sneak peek and description of the 15 advances that made the
shortlist, to give you a running start:

  • Anesthesia: In 1846, a Boston dentist used ether during
    surgery, putting an end to much of the pain of undergoing surgery. Since then,
    general anesthesia has become a mainstay in operations.
  • Antibiotics: Alexander Fleming, a British citrate medication sildenafil,
    discovered penicillin in 1928 by accident when he sloppily left a Petri dish of
    bacteria uncleaned in his lab. He found a substance (later named penicillin)
    growing on it that killed the bugs, and thus was the beginning of modern-day
    antibiotics. Fleming shared the Nobel Prize in 1945 for the discovery.
  • Chlorpromazine: Discovered in 1952, chlorpromazine
    (Thorazine) was the first antipsychotic medication. It was used to treat
    psychotic disorders and their symptoms, such as hallucinations, hostility, and
    delusions. Its development brought new understanding of the biological basis
    for mental illness, and some say it provided more humane management.
  • Computers. From medical records to insurance, to making
    sure your new medication isn’t going to clash with an existing one, computers
    are now viewed by some doctors as being as important as their stethoscopes.
    They’ve been in use in medicine since the early 1960s. Doctors can access
    information on new drugs and interactions, new medical studies, clinical
    trials, or keep patient records stored at their fingertips — so they’ll know
    in an instant if you really have kept the weight off.
  • DNA structure. Scientists James Watson and Francis Crick
    presented the structure of the DNA helix, the molecule responsible for carrying
    genetic information from one generation to the next, in 1953. It earned them
    the Nobel Prize in 1962.
  • Phentermine post soft viagra xanax
    medicine.
    As the name suggests,
    evidence-based medicine involves making use of the current best evidence (such
    as research), a patient’s values, and a doctor’s clinical experience to make
    decisions about patient care. The term was coined in the early ’90s and the
    concept has been evolving ever since.

More Nominations

  • Germ theory. In the late 1800s, Louis Pasteur was the
    first to suggest the theory that disease is caused by exposure to
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    . Others furthered the theory, showing that specific diseases are
    caused by specific “bugs.”
  • Imaging. The X-ray was accidentally discovered in 1895.
    Since then, the field has expanded, giving us computed tomography (CT scans),
    positron emission (PET scans), magnetic resonance imaging (MRIs), and
    ultrasound.
  • Immunology. The history of immunology is traced to 1798,
    when Edward Jenner found that people could be immunized against the disease
    smallpox. Numerous other immunology discoveries followed, leading to a greater
    understanding of such things as allergiesallergies and antibodies.
  • Oral rehydration therapy. As the name suggests, ORT
    involves giving fluids by mouth to replace losses of body water. It was first
    reported in 1964; now it’s a mainstay of treatment in patients with cholera,
    acute diarrheadiarrhea, and other conditions.
  • The pill. Since the pill arrived on the U.S. market in
    1960, it’s been hailed as one of the seven wonders of the world. For women who
    use it correctly, oral contraceptioncontraception can be up to 99% effective.
  • Risks of smoking. The first report of the connection
    between smoking and lung cancerlung cancer was published in BMJ in 1950. Even so,
    tobacco use still kills an estimated 440,000 Americans each year.
  • Sanitation. The importance of clean drinking water and
    waste disposal emerged in the late 1800s, as diseases began to be linked to
    impure water. But the World Health Organization says there is a long way to go.
    More than 1.1 billion people still lack access to drinking water from an
    improved source; 2.6 billion do not have basic sanitation.
  • Tissue culture. Tissue culture (keeping tissue alive and
    growing it in a culture medium for research or other purposes) was
    “discovered” in 1907, but it took until the 1950s for it to become an
    important tool for clinical investigation.
  • Vaccines. Vaccines have helped prevent a variety of
    diseases — including polio, whopping cough, and measlesmeasles. The first was Edward Jenner’s smallpox
    vaccine, in 1796.

The Envelope, Please

To vote, visit www.bmj.com.

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Breast Implants Lift Sex, Self-Esteem

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March 23, 2007 — Women report better sexuality and improved self-esteem
after cosmetic breast erectile dysfunction tablets
surgery, a University of Florida study
shows.

Cynthia Figueroa-Haas, PhD, clinical assistant professor at the University
of Florida College of Nursing, advertised for volunteers in the offices of
cosmetic plastic surgeons. Eighty-four women completed questionnaires on
self-esteem and sexuality before and after cosmetic breast augmentation
surgery.

Overall, the women didn’t have particularly low self-esteem or particularly
poor sexual function prior to surgery. But both aspects of their lives
ed tabs
improved after they got breast implants.

“They were already OK with self-esteem and sexuality — they just wanted
larger breasts,” Figueroa-Haas tells WebMD. “They got increased levels
of self-esteem and sexuality.”

Figueroa-Haas bristles at the idea that it’s frivolous for women to want to
improve their body image. Body image, she says, is an important factor in a
woman’s self-esteem.

“A lot of people consider plastic surgery a procedure that doesn’t need
to be done. They say women should stay with their bodies and what God gave them
and be satisfied. I don’t agree,” she says. “This procedure does change
women’s psychosocial issues. There are differences in life satisfaction
between people with good and poor self-esteem.”

Figueroa-Haas reports her findings in the January/March issue of Plastic
Surgical Nursing
.

Sex and Breast Augmentation

After getting breast implants, women experienced every measure of sexuality
more strongly, Figueroa-Haas found. After breast augmentation, women reported
significant increases in arousal, sexual desire, sexual satisfaction, and
lubrication.

Figueroa-Haas says women tend to be left out of the discussion when it comes
to enhancing sexuality.

“Improved sexuality is not all about men’s sexuality and Viagra,”
she says. “It is a subject women even have trouble discussing with other
women. But women who suffer sexuality issues feel like they are not feminine
enough.”

Despite the benefits she finds in cosmetic breast augmentation,
Figueroa-Haas warns that surgery cannot address serious underlying issues women
may have.

“This isn’t a cure-all. If you have underlying psychological issues,
don’t run out and see a plastic surgeon. These issues have to be addressed
first,” she says.

That’s a very important point, agrees clinical sildenafil citrate David B. Sarwer,
PhD, director of the weight and eating disorders program at the University of
Pennsylvania. Sarwer has studied psychological issues surrounding breast
augmentation surgery.

“Sure, body image is an important part of self-esteem,” Sarwer tells
WebMD. “But self-esteem is based on all sorts of things other than body
image. It may be unrealistic to think that, just by having breast augmentation,
a woman will improve her overall self-esteem.”

Sarwer has found that women who seek cosmetic breast surgery have their own,
personal motivations. They are not, as stereotype would have it, trying to
please their husbands or boyfriends.

Sarwer says women considering breast implants should consider three
things:

  • A woman should make sure it is what she wants. She should not seek plastic
    surgery under pressure from someone else.
  • “A breast implant is unlikely to change women’s lives in any major
    way,” Sarwer says. “They may get some positive attention, but they may
    also suffer negative attention. For everyone who says you look great, there may
    be whispers down the lane: ‘She is too big, too showy.’”
  • Some women seeking breast implants suffer from a serious psychological
    problem called body dysmorphic disorder: disproportionate concern over
    relatively minor physical erectile dysfunction pills
    . Both Sarwer and Figueroa-Haas warn
    that women must be evaluated for this condition before surgery.

And Sarwer warns that researchers are now becoming aware of a dark side to
breast implants: suicide.

“What we think is going on here, although we are not sure, is these
women have some pathology, perhaps clinical depression, prior to surgery,”
he says. “And when implants don’t improve their depression, these women
become suicidal. For women with profound underlying issues, there is something
going on here that is potentially dangerous.”

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Loss of Libido in Men

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Men dont like to talk about it; neither do their partners. But loss of
libido in men or inhibited sexual desire stresses a marriage more than any
other sexual dysfunction, according to Barry McCarthy, co-author of
Rekindling Desire: A Step by Step Program to Help Low-Sex and No-Sex
Marriages.

Losing interest in sex may not be as common an generic viagra side effects
for men as it is
for women: It affects about 15% to 16% of men, and at least double that many
women. But when men lose interest in sex it scares them more than women –
their masculinity is so linked to their sexuality that it is very
threatening, says Esther Perel, a couples therapist in New York city and
author of Mating in Captivity.

Loss of libido also makes men more unhappy about the rest of their
lives than it does women. Only 23% of men with loss of libido say they
still feel very happy about life in general vs. 46% of women, says Edward
Laumann, professor of sociology at the University of Chicago co-author of
The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United
States
. It bothers men more.

But loss of libido is not something you have to live with. There is much you
can do to regain your sex drive and your happy outlook on life.

How Do You Know if You have a Problem With Loss of Libido?

Libido loss doesnt usually happen suddenly its not like catching a cold
where you wake up one morning and whoops, there it is. It can be a gradual
process. Though difficult to define precisely, Laumann measures it as follows:
It is a lack of interest in sex for several months of the past
year.

Frequency of sexual activity is not the best measure of sexual interest so
many circumstances can get in the way of an encounter, even if the desire is
there. But if you are in a committed relationship and having sex less often
than the norm — about once a week you might ask yourself whether you are
happy with things as they are.

If youre not happy about your loss of libido, cheapest generic substitute viagra
agree that it is
best to grapple with these issues before they become entrenched. To help
identify the early warning signs, see whether you answer the following
questions true or false:

  1. Touching takes place only in the bedroom.
  2. Sex does not give you feelings of connection and sharing.
  3. One of you is always the initiator and the other feels pressured.
  4. You no longer look forward to sex.
  5. Sex is mechanical and routine.
  6. You almost never have sexual thoughts or fantasies about your spouse.
  7. You have sex once or twice a month at most.

If you answered true to many or most of these questions, you may be on your
way to losing sexual desire, writes McCarthy. Understanding the various causes
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Sex in Menopause City

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Nov. 19, 2004 — Here’s the disturbing fact you probably already know: As a
woman ages and hormone levels drop, so too can her enjoyment of — and
oftentimes desire for — sex.

Here’s the good news: Though saying goodbye to hormones and sex may happen
in the same breath, the latest research indicates that sexual desire has less
to do with this change than it does with lifestyle and other health
factors, at least some of which are under a woman’s direct control.

These are the encouraging results reported by a group of distinguished
European sex experts this month in the first ever supplement to
Menopause, the journal of the North American Menopause Society.

“The findings have helped healthcare professionals discard the notion
that sexual buy online soft tab viagra
occurring close to menopause are either biologic or
physiologic,” writes Rosemary Basson, FRCP, a professor of psychiatry and
of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of British Columbia and guest
editor of the special issue.

The new research was part of a series of studies conducted on female sexual
dysfunction by the department of clinical psychiatry and erectile dysfunction tabs
at
Hannover Medical School in Hannover, Germany. As part of the overall project,
102 women aged 20 to “45 plus” answered 165 queries designed to flush
out determinants of female sexual satisfaction.

Specifically, researchers hoped to determine satisfaction with sex life in
general, sexual satisfaction and orgasm during intercourse, petting,
masturbation, attitudes towards sexuality, quality of partnership, and sexual
myths.

What the study found: There appeared to be no age differences with respect
to frequency of sexual intercourse or the desire for sexual activity not
involving intercourse among the differing age groups.

Moreover, age did not make a difference in regard to frequency of orgasm or
in sexual satisfaction ratings with their partners. For example, 29% of women
up to age 45 reported having orgasms “very often,” compared with 26% of
women over age 45.

Even more dramatic was that while 41% of women over age 45 reported having
orgasms “often,” only 29% of younger women reported having orgasm
“often.”

Among the few differences in the groups: Women over 45 reported having fewer
orgasms during non-intercourse sexual activity or during masturbation. Both
groups of women reported a dual dimension necessary for successful lovemaking
that included having both feelings of emotional closeness to their partner and
satisfactory physical experiences.

After comparing all the answers from both older and younger women, as well
as from women who reported sexual problems and those who did not, researchers
concluded that the single most influential factor with regard to sexual
satisfaction via intercourse was the quality of the partnership, in particular
the quality of mutual respect, which then becomes of greater importance as a
woman ages.

After comparing these study results to earlier and ongoing findings, the
researchers concluded that the basis of any sexual problems that did occur at
midlife could not be drawn from menopause status or age alone. Instead, they
write, “Life stressors, contextual factors, past sexuality, and mental
health problems are more erectile dysfunction
predictors of midlife women’s sexual
interest than menopause status itself.”

The study was one of just several research papers presented in the journal
this month on the subject of female sexual dysfunction. All strived to shed
much needed light on a subject that some believe has been hidden in the shadows
too long.

For NYU professor of gynecology Steven Goldstein, MD, the findings validate
what he has long suspected to be true.

“It’s quite wonderful that this is being studied and that the results
reinforce what I, and I think many doctors have long believed — that this
whole issue of changes in midlife sexual function is not a simple case of ‘take
away the hormones, take away the desire,’” Goldstein tells WebMD.

Moreover, he adds that “As we go forward, understanding all of the
complex, non-hormonal elements that affect a woman’s sexuality remains crucial,
particularly when deciding who is a candidate for a hormonal treatment that
might help increase desire and who might benefit more from simple lifestyle
changes,” says Goldstein.

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High Blood Pressure Aftermath

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Lying awake nights worrying if terrorists or bird flu will get you?
Consider, instead, a threat that’s far closer to home, and one that you can
control: high blood pressure.

One in three adults has high blood pressure, but only 61% are under
treatment and roughly two-thirds do not have it under control, according to the
American Heart Association (AHA) web site. In 2004, the disease killed more
than 50,000 people in the U.S., yet the AHA says high blood pressure is easily
detected and usually controllable.

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of blood pressure medications are one reason people never seek
treatment (what if it makes me impotent?), abandon treatment (these swollen
ankles look terrible), or cut back on their medication dosage (I’m tired of
being tired).

WebMD talked with two bulk generic viagra
and a pharmacist about seven
complications you should be aware of. Most importantly, they say that
complications shouldn’t be a reason to abandon treatment or cut back on
prescribed dosages. Instead, talk to your doctor or pharmacist. “We have
200 medications for treating high blood pressure,” says Thomas Giles, MD,
who is professor of medicine at Louisiana State University School of Medicine
in New Orleans. “We’ll keep on it till we find what will give you the best
result and be least intrusive in your life. It’s no good to make people feel
terrible, and we don’t have to do that.”

1. Fatigue and Dizziness

Dan Jones, MD, tells WebMD that when people begin taking blood pressure
medication, the most common problem is fatigue. Jones is dean of the School of
Medicine at the University of Mississippi in Jackson, and spokesman for the
American Heart Association (AHA). “It’s especially true for older patients.
If blood pressure has been elevated for a while, when the medication is taken
and the blood pressure begins to come down, for a period of time there’s less
circulation in some of the vessels, including those in the brain. It takes time
for those cause of male impotence vessels to relax. There may be a perception that there’s
less blood flow, which can produce fatigue or dizziness. If it’s mild, it can
be worked through simply by staying with the medication.”

A patient who feels fatigued when on the medication may decide instead of
taking it daily to take it every few days or so. “When they go off it, the
blood pressure rises and they feel better,” says Jones. “If they
continue this cycle, they never get past the fatigue, which typically will go
away after two to six weeks of therapy.”

2. Cough

ACE inhibitors are a class of medication that can cause a persistent cough
in 10% to 15% of patients. “Don’t continue the medication,” says Giles.
“I tell patients that if they get a cough, let me know.” If the ACE
inhibitor is stopped, it will need to be replaced with some other drug.
Examples of ACE inhibitors include: Lotensin, Monopril, Prinivil, Zestril,
Accupril, Altace, Vasotec, and Capoten.

3. Frequent Urination

No one wants to become famous for frequent bathroom breaks. Using diuretics
successfully is a matter of timing. Try to take them in the beginning of your
day. “I tell patients not to take the diuretic and drink a lot of water
before they go to bed,” says Giles, who is president of the American
Society of Hypertension. “And don’t take your pill before a one-hour taxi
ride to my office. Wait till you get here to take it.” One of the most
common diuretics used for high blood pressure is hydrochlorothiazide. It may be
in its own pill on in combined formulations such as Hyzaar or Maxide.

4. Fluid Retention

Virtually any medication for levitra vs cialis
that isn’t a diuretic can cause
edema or fluid retention. Swelling of the ankles and legs can be more than a
cosmetic problem. “Calcium channel blockers like amlodipine (also known as
Norvasc) and nifedipine (also known as Procardia) are famous for causing
swelling and pain in the legs,” says Sarah Ray, PharmD, BCPS. These drugs
can also worsen underlying heart failure or other heart problems or reveal an
unknown heart condition. “We’ve seen patients discover a heart problem only
after starting on a calcium channel blocker.”

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Not Tonight, Honey

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By Sarah Mahoney

Good Housekeeping Magazine Logo
Youve Said It. Youve Heard It. How To Put That Excuse To
BedAnd Get Back In The Mood

Be honest. How many times have you turned down sex this month? Even the best
marriages have sexual cold fronts and everyday over the counter viagra
a crushing work
deadline, a sick parent, or an acting-out teenthat can put the chill on
romance. But when sex evasion turns into a daily habit, marriage can become an
arctic zone. After all, there’s room for only so many nights of “Do we have
to? I’ve got a bad headache” before serious problems set in.

“It helps many couples to think of sex as a bank account,” says Lana
Holstein, M.D., author of Your Long Erotic Weekend . “If you just
got back from a vacation where you had lots of time alone, then saying I’m too
wiped out tonight’ isn’t a problem. But if you haven’t had much sex in the last
six months, then it took your husband some courage to ask. If you say no, that
can be damaging.”

And both partners, not just the avoider, are harmed. “The spouse with
more desire feels rejected, and the spouse with less desire feels coerced,”
says Barry McCarthy, Ph.D., author of Rekindling Desire: A Step-by-Step
Program to Help Low-Sex and No-Sex Marriages
.

If you’re the avoider, try putting yourself in your husband’s shoes. Says
Dr. Holstein, who coaches clients at Miraval Resort in Tucson, AZ: “When a
wife turns down sex, what does she want her husband to do instead? Should he go
masturbate? My clients usually say, No, I don’t want him to do that!’ Nor do
they want him to spend an hour on a pornography Web site.”

Another reason to say yes when your husband makes a move: It’s good for your
health. “Sex, and the cuddling that comes with it, releases all kinds of
chemicals women need,” says Dr. Holstein, “including erectile pill

hormones like dopamine, norepinephrine, and oxytocin.” What’s more, a study
from Wilkes University in Wilkes-Barre, PA, found that couples who had sex
regularly had higher levels of erectile dysfunction medication
generic viagra overnight delivery
than those who
didn’t.

So it’s time to outsmart your erectile dysfunction remedy
self (don’t listen to hershe’s
probably just grouchy from wearing sweatpants too often). Here, six common
cop-outs, and what to say insteadto your husband and yourself:

“Didn’t we just do it last week?”

Mismatched desire is one of the most common complaints marriage counselors
hearbut experts say that the excuse is pure baloney. “Two different people
will never have exactly the same desire, drive, and timing,” says Rick
Warren, the founding pastor of Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, CA, and author
of the best-selling book The Purpose Driven Life . “Sometimes you
have to make love for the benefit of the other person, even though you may not
need it yourself at the moment.”

“There’s no such thing as the right level of desire. Normal is usually
whatever the desired frequency is for that couple,” adds Gerald R. Weeks,
Ph.D., chairman of the marriage and family therapy department at the University
of Nevada, Las Vegas. (In case you’re curious about what other couples consider
normal, here are stats from University of Chicago researchers: About 38 percent
of married women have sex a few times a week; 47 percent a few times a month;
and 15 percent a few times a year.)

What to say to yourself:

Remember your wedding day? When you said “I do,” you said “I
do” to sex too. “Even though you may not have promised to love, honor,
and have sex once a week,’ when you made a commitment to your relationship, it
was understood that sex would be part of the bargain,” say Patricia Love
and Steven Stosny, authors of How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking
About It
. And, yes, sometimes you have to be the instigator. When it
comes to different levels of desire, “the ball is in the court of the
person who wants it less,” says Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., author of the
forthcoming Prime: Advice and Adventures from a Sexologist on Life and Love
in the Sensuous Years
.

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Making Lust Last

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By Keith Ablow, M.D.

Good Housekeeping Magazine Logo
Rekindling Passion For The Husband You Still Love

People sometimes tell me they know a couple married 20 years whose sex life
is still as good as it ever was. Here’s what I tell them in return: “There
are only three possibilities. One: This couple is lying. Two: They are telling
the truth, because they didn’t have good sex to begin with. Or three: Sex is
all they really have together. They never connected emotionally.”

I’ve drawn that conclusion by listening to the many dozens of husbands and
wives I’ve counseled, almost all of whom have admitted that after 10 or 20
years of marriage, passion became elusive.

Sharing lives is different from sharing dinners and long walks and weekends
away. When you were dating the man you ultimately married, you were both acting
much of the time (ed pills
or not), putting your best feet forward in order
to be attractive to each other.

When you were sick or had a bad headache, you probably pretended it was no
big deal. So did he. Now when your stomach is upset, you feel free to tell him
you’re about to throw up.

When you had an argument with a close friend or your sister, you might have
told him, “It really wasn’t the best day, but it’s getting better now that
we’re together.” He might have smiled, taken your hand, and said, “Tell
me what happened. I want to know.” Now when he asks how your day was, you
might just say, “Fine,” and leave it at that. And he might be happy to
leave it at that too.

Nobody would write that kind of dialogue into a romantic movieunless it was
a sad or serious one. But that’s how married people generally talk because no
one can always act adoring or keep up an air of mystery while sharing the same
space with his or her spouse, year after year. Here are the truths about sex,
as I’ve learned from years of counseling, for most married couples:

Love is constant; passion needs recharging

No surprise: Everything in the universe eventually demagnetizes when left in
proximity to something of the opposite charge. Magnets do, and men and women do
too. Some people fall out of lust in seven days, never mind seven yearsor 17.
Basic animal attraction is a force of nature that seems designed to make us
matenot mate for life. Relaxing in our marriages and freeing ourselves from
the pressure of trying to impress our partners has a predictable outcome: Our
partners are not impressed. The magnetic spell we once cast on them begins to
lift.

Cozy is comfortable, but not sexy

To the extent that men and women become real to each other, they cease to be
princes and princesses, gods and goddesses who inspire romantic fantasies or
amorous worship. Since couples lucky enough to be emotionally genuine with each
other share so many real moments, they need to pay special attention to
creating magical onesbecause great sex requires magic. I’d never suggest that
a couple trade their warm, safe home life for better sex. Why keep your
distance just so you can make love with abandon? I believe you can have a close
marriage and recapture a good sex lifebut only once you admit that viagra soft generic

romance takes creativity and a commitment of time and energy.

Intimacy doesn’t equal sex

When a man and a woman reveal themselves to each other, it makes each person
feel more vulnerable. And, particularly for men, it’s hard to have amazing sex
while feeling emotionally exposed. Our earliest over the counter erectile dysfunction drug
with being close
come from our relationships with parents. And those relationships aren’t (in
any normal scenario) linked with sexual passion. That’s why some husbands and
wives are open about what pleases them sexually only when they have affairs.
They feel as if they have to be free of “family” to be free with their
amorous impulses.

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Why Women Lose Interest in Sex

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Living with libido loco? For a growing number of women,
declining hormones, job stress, relationship issues, menopause, and other
problems are taking their toll in the bedroom.

Loss of sexual desire, known in medical terms as hypoactive
sexual desire disorder (HSDD), is the most common form of sexual dysfunction
among women of all ages. A recent study showed that nearly one-third of women
aged 18 to 59 suffer from a lost interest in sex, and it’s not all in their
heads.

Unlike men’s main sexual complaint, erectile dysfunction,
women’s biggest sexual problem is caused by a combination of both mental and
physical factors, which aren’t likely to be cured by merely popping a pill.

“Women’s sexuality tends to be multifaceted and fairly
complicated,” says sex psychologist Sheryl Kingsberg, PhD. “Although we
would love to simplify it so we could have the one-two or even a one-punch
treatment, it doesn’t tend to work that way.”

But the introduction of ed pills
treatments in the last
few years has spurred more research into the causes of sexual dysfunction among
both men and women, and effective therapies are available to help put the lust
back into women’s lives.

What Is Low Sexual Desire?

Contrary to popular belief, experts say frequency of sexual
intercourse has nothing to do with sexual desire or satisfaction.

“One of first things I do in speaking to women who come in
with sexual concerns is let them know that there is no normal frequency or set
of behaviors and things change with time,” says Jan Shifren, MD, an
assistant professor at Harvard Medical School. “If it’s working for them
and/or their partner, there is no problem.”

But when a woman experiences a significant decrease in interest
in sex that is having an effect on her life and is causing distress, then it’s
considered a problem of low sexual desire or HSDD.

Kingsberg says that sexual desire is more than just an issue of
low libido or sex drive. She says sexual drive is the biological component of
desire, which is reflected as spontaneous sexual interest including sexual
thoughts, erotic fantasies, and daydreams.

Kingsberg, who is an associate professor of reproductive
biology at the Case Western Reserve School of Medicine says, “It’s about
your body signaling that it wants to be sexual. Whether or not there is any
intention to act on it, we all have a certain level of drive.”

That sexual drive declines naturally with age based on
physiological factors. But sexual desire also encompasses interpersonal and
psychological factors that create a willingness to be sexual.

“Above and beyond horniness, it is the sense of intimacy in
the relationship,” says Kingsberg. “If you are mad at your spouse, you
could be horny but you’re not going want to be sexual with that particular
person.”

Therefore, all of these aspects of sexual desire must be
examined in order to determine the root of the problem.

Common causes for a loss of sexual desire and drive in women
include:

  • Interpersonal relationship issues. Partner performance problems,
    lack of emotional satisfaction with the relationship, the birth of a child, and
    becoming a caregiver for a loved one can decrease sexual desire.
  • Sociocultural influences. Job stress, peer pressure, and media
    images of sexuality can negatively influence sexual desire.
  • Low testosterone. Testosterone affects sexual drive in both men and
    women. Testosterone levels peak in women’s mid-20s and then steadily decline
    until menopause, when they drop dramatically.
  • Medical problems: Mental illnesses such as depression, or medical
    conditions, such as dysfunction pills
    , fibroids, and thyroid disorders, impact a
    woman’s sexual drive both mentally and physically.
  • Medications: Certain antidepressants (including the new generation
    of SSRIs), blood pressure lowering drugs, and oral contraceptives can lower
    sexual drive in many ways, such as decreasing available testosterone levels or
    affecting blood flow.
  • Age. Blood levels of androgens fall sildenafil citrate in women as they
    age.

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